I had this conversation with Mr PBBB last night, who'd chanced his liver on an event at The Rake and who was phoning me to announce his departure:
Mr PBBB: Hello I'm coming home now.
Mr PBBB: It was a great event.
Mr PBBB: I've got you a present.
Me: Is it beer?
Mr PBBB: Yes.
Mr PBBB: But it's your beer, I won't drink it.
Mr PBBB: I'll just get my coat.